My name is Lalani Garner and I’m working on my second degree in criminal justice at THE Elizabeth City State University. I am a native of southern California but have moved to the east coast because I’ve fallen in love with the nature of North Carolina. I do yoga, read, and laugh all the time. My dream is to work in family law and be an entrepreneur on the side. My goals for 2019 includes finishing this year in school off strong, growing stronger spiritually and mentally, and living in my truth!!
What does Self-love mean to you?
Self-love means to me looking in the mirror when no one else is around and loving who you see, it is hugging yourself and being okay with the hard lessons you’ve made because they’ve made you stronger. Self-love is putting me first mentally and spiritually, loving my stretch marks, loving being a black woman, and loving who I was before I became who I am now.
What was the hardest part of loving yourself?
The hardest part was acknowledging the part I played in self-sabotage, whether that be in relationships, career opportunities, etc. Once I learned what self-sabotage was, I knew that I did deserve joy and I had to stop doing that to myself if I wanted was waiting for me.
Have you ever felt like you couldn’t love yourself? If so, why? If not, have you ever felt fear to love yourself?
I have felt fear to love myself. I knew that if I put all my focus on me and my growth, I’d accomplish everything I was meant to accomplish. I was scared of my own success, of the benefits that loving myself would bring out. Not anymore.
What do you value about yourself?
I value my voice, my kind heart, and my natural instinct to nurture.
What do you do to make yourself feel better from self-doubts, self-sabotage, fears, comparison & etc.?
Post notes on my wall that are solely for when I have bad anxiety, like “You are in control.” There are others about feeling fear, prayers, etc. I also listen to motivational videos every morning.
Do you believe you can love yourself differently from loving others? Why or why not?
I do believe that you can, for me it’s about putting more into myself than others. I used to be a people pleaser. So, I understand if you don’t love and pour into yourself more than you do others, you will feel extremely drained. You can constantly love and support others, while making sure you are still your number one priority.
How do you show yourself love?
I do yoga, meditate, boost myself up, rest when I need to, journal, dance, laugh, daily reflection, etc.
What do you believe about loving yourself?
“Do the work that no one sees, the work that takes place in your heart. Start yourself love journey when you’re ready, but make sure you start.”
What do you think of yourself?
I am a Queen of Resilience and God is always walking by me giving me all the strength and guidance I need.
Why do you love yourself?
It’s a mandatory ingredient in my book of life.
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